the long days

every once in awhile i have encountered a 2, 3, or 4 day span where the day just drags on forever. the lessons aren't working at all. they either don't understand it or won't stop talking long enough to let me speak. it's these times where teaching has become the hardest for me.

during these times it really is no longer teaching, but creative babysitting. all of a sudden i am forced to rethink everything and i have about 4 seconds to come up with a new solution. sometimes not even 4 seconds because a few of my "choice" students didn't take their meds that day.

it's in these moments that i must get better. i need to have a better bank of ideas and activities to think through and choose from.
as these days drag on, it seems like it will never end, the bell will never ring. of course it always does and then my attempts to reflect are confusing and lost.

one student has a very difficult time dealing with behavior. he knows exactly what he is doing is wrong. he does it anyway. everything i say, he attempts to correct. he is probably exactly how i was when i was in school, except a little dumber.
the decisions he makes baffles me. i have established he likes attention, but it goes farther than that. i know that he has parental figures and that those figures have expectations for him academically. he knows that he will get grounded if i have to call home and speak to either of them.

each day he makes very deliberate attempts to get into trouble. i don't think he does it to annoy me and i don't buy into the whole "he just wants attention even if it's negative." it's possible that he sees it as a constant attempt to prove to peers that he doesn't care, he does what he wants. he is very well liked and a good kid. this is going to be ongoing, but i like this. by writing it, i have already calmed down more and it gives me the chance to break it up and also realize how small some of the stuff is on the grander scale.

how do i teach that better? i will ask myself that many times. but when i didn't get the chance to teach, i am not sure how to plan more effectively next time. these days are almost lost days, my students falling even more behind.

i have been thinking about the idea of splitting them into groups by ability for math, but i really don't like that. my kids aren't bright, but they sure as hell aren't stupid. they know they are in a basement for a reason. i can't really expect them to function knowing they are in the lower group on top of being in the basement.

i would also like to think of more rewards for the class. after they take a test or have a lesson that goes really well. think about that for the very near future.