persevere

the title of this post is something that i will never have to truly experience.

has your father ever beat you with a belt?

have your parents' ever threatened to give you away to DSS?

do you fear going home because you don't know if your mom is drunk?

didn't think so.

think about that and then go into a classroom and attempt to teach.

i am a bad teacher. i can't wait to fix what i am and how i can be better.

i really can't imagine being in my students' shoes, but i will try. i will try now and continue to try for this year and for the rest of the years that i teach.

all out war

19 days left of school.

title really says it all about that topic. we finished up our MCAS this week and it was tough. When proctoring for my students, half of me wants to help them and give them extra clues and the other half of me is so pissed they can't get the answer right to the topics we covered two days before in class. it is quite a love/hate relationship.

on a side note, i am absolutely exhausted. between coaching, teaching, training, and life, i am running on fumes. remember this for next year and maybe there will be something that i can do to better prepare me for this time of the year. but it is very difficult right now.

almost there.

to touch back on a topic that my last post addressed, i don't like that way my kids make me act/feel. these students are at a very difficult time right now. there world is going to be turned all-which-way around next year, moving on to 6th grade and the middle school. i try to cut them some slack, but it isn't possible. they blatantly refuse to do things some days, the next day wonder why we don't have free time, complain when we get free time that they are bored and then complain some more. it's nuts.

one very positive aspect of these students is their extreme lack of short term memory. not a positive for educational purposes, but for my purpose. they will get in trouble and be really mad that it's my fault they get sent to the office. they won't talk to me and ignore me until they get to the office. but, by afternoon, they are completely unaware of the mornings events and are able to function, which is nice.

rambling. i wish i could post more often, but i just don't have the energy to do it outside of school and i usually don't want to think about school while i am at it either.